No matter your gender or sexual orientation, dating can seem like a minefield.

Sometimes we meet the wrong people, choose a bad venue or fall head over heels with someone who just wants to be friends. We can be a very picky bunch. Having fixed ideas of what you want — which usually boil down to looks and little else — could be standing in your way of meeting some great guys.

Not only is this far too prescriptive, you also run the risk of coming across as overly negative.

21 Dating Struggles Gay Men Face In Their Twenties

Say what you like to do, who you want to be with, and why people should date you. This is becoming a bigger issue in the gay dating world.

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All this liberation and equality is leading to increased bigotry among us. But I want to make one thing clear: There seems to be this assumption, especially when you are more attracted to older guys, that you want something from them because you are a poor twentysomething with no direction. Not true.

Dating Tips For Gay Men

We are all trying to figure out how we are going to stage the rest of our lives. So, it takes an extra couple steps to find someone in a similar stage of life with a schedule that works with yours, with similar goals, and who is willing to make a commitment. Everything is ever-changing. I'm so tired of going on one date with a guy and then he thinks we are an item.

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And, in general, I despise this notion we have in our culture today that you have to be practically already in a relationship to date. After seeing an attractive guy, you have to make small talk. Only when you have learned about the person do you ask them on a date. It's not that serious. If you see a guy you like, ask him out. If it doesn't work out, then it doesn't work out. Let's chat there later. He later did find me on there later, but I ignored him simply because You get two men together, something is always bound to happen.

But, that can be a complicated issue. I've been on many first dates sealed with sex at the end of the night. I feel like a lot of gay people, not all, feel like something's missing otherwise, but sex is definitely like the goodnight kiss rather than something uber romantic. And most apps are hookup apps. It's just too easy to get a fix. Who wants to go through all that dating bullshit?

10 Dating Tips For Gay Men (That, Really, EVERYONE Should Follow)

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