I was truly, finding myself. Part of that process meant giving back to others. Giving up things I thought I knew about myself, and really starting to figure out how to love myself. In these processes, I found that singing gave vent to my heart.
Allowed me to feel and express those feelings in ways that helped me to heal. I was assigned to the bass section. Not unusual, even though my range would carry me into baritone readily. The basses needed some reinforcement and I was to serve.
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I enjoyed the music we made, the comraderie of a group of men who were out in the community, and the fellowship of my fellow bass singers in sectional rehearsals. Jim Metcalf was another member of the bass section. He was quite a bit older, retired, and self confident. Both of us had taken leadership positions with the choir, and had known each other socially for a little less than six months.
Never even a consideration on my physical attraction radar. Then, after CCMC performed another memorial service for one of our members The AIDS crisis was still extracting a sugnificant toll on our community Jim asked if anyone in the section wanted to get some lunch.
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I, being an insulin dependent diabetic, knew that lunch was a necessity, so I readily offered my interest. All the others had other commitments, so Jim and I were to have lunch on our own. However, over that lunch I found someone who intrigued and complemented me. Our conversation covered a large range of issues. As I told the boys back at the house, the University of Texas diving team could have walked in the door of the Congress Avenue Diner in their speedos with cock to butt, and I would not have noticed unless Jim had pointed out which he certainly would have the visuals being presented.
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He was a complement and reinforcement of who I was becoming. He asked permission to kiss me that evening after long chats, a dinner he built from scratch, and a few alcoholic beverages. I never left him after that day. We spent 25 years together, the last three as husband and husband. We only parted after I gave him the acknowledgement that I would be okay after he was gone. He died June from complications of love and a truly broken heart a mitral valve that had dissembled in his heart.
I know that this is a long answer. True love does that quite often.
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How do you achieve that? First of all, concentrate on being the best person you can be. Discover yourself. The more you know about yourself, the more genuine the love can be. Someone else is going to fall in love with who you are in that moment. Instead, look for yourself and look to help others. Doing so will bring you into contact with others that find the person they discover irresistible. Love is apparently not something that you can make occur.
It is not something you find. It is the result of being in relation to others. Many will tell you that shit happens. Well, love happens in a similar way. Or join a soccer team or the film club.
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Just do something so that you are forced to meet more people than the ones you already know. A lot of guys find their boyfriends online , and the Internet is a great tool for gay teens. But meeting someone over the Internet will be a little different than meeting someone in person. For example, a lot of people cast a wide net when trying to meet someone online and it is possible that the guy who seems so interested in getting to know you is also sending those messages to a bunch of other people.
Plus, while people don't always represent themselves honestly in real life, it is in some ways easier to claim to be someone you aren't when you don't meet in person. Most people spend some time dating and getting to know a potential partner before they decide to move into boyfriend mode. Please don't beat yourself or get too gloomy if that happens. A friend of mine once said that he believed gay men had particularly-evolved critical thinking skills. While two gay men might love one another in their relationship, they will still subtly compete with one another to others, like most males in the animal kingdom.
This can be a certain mutual benefit, but it can also be a source of competition or even resentment of what the other has that he lacks.
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We want to make ourselves attractive to each other, but we also tend to want to be recognized and admired in our own right by others. For gay male couples, loving and accepting the self individually and in context of each other, and society at large, can be a challenge. Politics — I think gay male couples are just simply more affected by politics, changes in laws, and changes in society than straight couples are. When we watch the evening news, or read news outlets online, they are often talking about us as gay men. That just puts an extra stress on the day, in addition to the fact that the Internet service provider is down or that the cat just threw up grass on the carpet.
Gay male couples tend to be more politically aware, and even more politically active attending protests, writing letters, attending fundraisers, observing boycotts, making donations than straight couples, because their rights and existence are challenged every day these days with a certain urgency and immediacy that straight couples are generally spared. However, form, endure, and happily, they do, often without my help at all. What is your experience with the above 10 items of difference?
Your comments and feedback are welcome. For more information on my therapy and coaching services, or for more articles on many topics of interest to gay men, visit www. Tap here to turn on desktop notifications to get the news sent straight to you. Tetra Images via Getty Images. These are the issues that come up repeatedly in couples counseling sessions: Canada U.
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