Romantic infidelity is a different story — more on that later. My name is Alexander Cheves, and I am known by friends in the kink and leather community as Beastly.

I am a sex-positive writer and blogger. As with everything I write, the intent of this piece is to break down the stigmas surrounding the sex lives of gay men. Those who are sensitive regarding frank discussions about sex are invited to click elsewhere, but consider this: If you are outraged by content that addresses sex openly and honestly, I invite you to examine this outrage and ask yourself whether it should instead be directed at those who oppress us by policing our sexuality.

For all others, enjoy the slideshow. And feel free to leave your own suggestions for sex and dating topics in the comments.

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1. Know why you have chosen each other

Sexy Beast. These warning signs deserve your attention. Not healthy love, in any case. No balanced relationship can survive if there is not a strong level of trust between the two participants.

There may be a tendency especially in the beginning days of your love story to want to be with your boyfriend night and day. This is a common mistake to make and can be the reason that new relationships burn out quickly. Make sure to leave each other space and breathing room. Even if it does not come naturally to you, force yourself to go out and participate in the activities you loved before you were a couple.

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Your sports, your writing workshop, your volunteer work with the LGBT group—whatever you were involved with prior to meeting Mr. Right, keep on doing it. It keeps you interesting and will keep your guy interested in you. Nothing dims the flames of love faster than routine. Once you hit your relationship stride, it is easy to fall into the trap of routine. Surprise weekend trips, an exotic vacation, a new sport, trying something different in the bedroom…get out of your comfort zone and see where this takes you and your partner.

Make sure you time take to show your partner that you prioritize your relationship. What are some of the ways you can do this? Dedicate one night each week to date night, where you try a new restaurant, go to the symphony, listen to a lecture at the local university…anything where you are doing something together.

Take time to focus on each other and talk…about your week, your work, your stresses and your successes. Remember the power of mere kissing and long hugs. Even if one of you is too tired for sex, a long, relaxing massage is a great way to communicate how much you value your partner. When you are with the right person, you want to do what it takes to make the relationship a success.

Fortunately, because you have chosen the right person, these things will not seem like chores! If your gay relationship is happy and mutually-enriching, putting into place these tips will seem natural. Good love is a priceless gift, and working to ensure that it lasts is worth it. Marriage Course.